What's in a Name?

Name's have always been really important to me. I've always found it fascinating that in the Old Testament children were often named something that symbolized what was going on spiritually in the family or even in Israel. Or parents were told by God what the name would be because it meant something that the child would become. All this to say, I wanted a name that meant something to our family. I did not want to pick a name just because I thought it was pretty or popular. And I really wanted a name that somehow pointed to nature.

During our years of infertility I started praying that God would reveal to me the name He wanted me to give our first child. During that journey, there was a point in time in which I became convicted about the particular scripture verses I was seeking out for comfort. I had been dwelling in the verses about suffering and basically feeding my "woe is me" mentality when the Spirit clearly said "read the ends of the stories." I suddenly realized I was reading scriptures for comfort and stopping before the happy ending came - the promised "joy comes in the morning." I guess I was scared to believe God actually had a happy ending for me. One such specific story was Job's. I stopped dwelling in the first 41 chapters and decided to hang out in chapter 42. As hard as it was to believe that things would one day be better than I ever could have imagined, I started to dare to believe that. And that's when one day while reading Job 42:14, I suddenly felt deep deep in my soul that my daughter would be named Keziah like one of Job's daughters whom the Lord blessed him with after all his suffering. I thought it was a beautiful name and when I found out the name came from a spice tree that grows in Israel (it's similar to cinnamon), that was all the confirmation I needed. The name pointed to nature and would always symbolize to our family that joy does come in the morning; God always redeems and gives back abundantly more than satan or the brokenness of our world could ever take away.

Keziah's middle name Rain is also the result of this spiritual journey. "What's true in the spiritual realm is true in the physical realm." I heard that in church once upon a time. I don't exactly have scripture to back it up but it sure has seemed to be true in my life. If I open my eyes and look around - inevitably what is happening that I can see always seems to symbolize the bigger things happening that I can't see. Maybe this is why I see God in nature so much. If you live near me you might recall that 2007 and 2008 were horrible drought years for us. We had like no rain ever. It was constantly on the news about how bad things were for the local farmers. Many counties instituted water conservation laws and fines. The lakes were at all time low levels. It seemed like we were never going to get rain. We were living in a barren land. And I would laugh and tell Michael Paul, "of course - my barrenness is affecting my whole community." The constant dryness and lack of life that I was seeing in nature reminded me that I too was barren and incapable of supporting life. It felt a little like nature was mocking me. And then 2009 came. And rain came ...and came ....and came. It poured. It flooded. It rained almost everyday in February and March. Our basement flooded bad. And it just kept raining. I remember exactly where I was when one day in April, while driving in the pouring rain, my mom called to tell me that our friend Lauren had told her at church that she felt like God told her to tell me I needed to listen to this song. The song was Every Season by Nicole Nordemon. (click here for lyrics) I knew the song well but felt confused as to why it was supposed to bring me comfort. I started crying and telling my mom, "it's not fair - the theme of that song is that spring comes and brings life and makes all things new and it's pouring down rain here but I am still barren so that song obviously does not apply to me." I got very worked up over it. Looking back now I am ashamed of my lack of faith. It is obvious now what the Lord and all of nature was saying to me at that moment. I was pregnant. Not only was the drought over in our land - it was over in me. It was raining and growing life all around me. And I was growing life within me. It didn't take me long after finding out I was pregnant to decide I had to name my child Rain.

We continued to have lots of rain in 2009 and nature continued to symbolize my spiritual journey throughout my pregnancy. Our Irises bloomed all year. Irises typically bloom for a few weeks in the spring and then that's it. But our irises continued to bloom throughout fall. Even after several frosts and freezes we continued to get flowers. The last one lasted until mid-December. We kept taking pictures of them because it was so bizarre. Every time I left my house or looked out the window, nature (God) said, "look ... life ...spring ...life ...rain...I'm bringing you life."